Quote of the Day (2014-03-31)

Fezzik: You never said anything about killing anyone.

Vizzini: I've hired you to help me start a war. It's an prestigious line of work, with a long and glorious tradition.

Fezzik: I just don't think it's right, killing an innocent girl.

Vizzini: Am I going MAD, or did the word "think" escape your lips? You were not hired for your brains, you hippopotamic land mass.

Inigo Montoya: I agree with Fezzik.

Vizzini: Oh, the sot has spoken. What happens to her is not truly your concern. I will kill her. And remember this, never forget this: when I found you, you were so slobbering drunk, you couldn't buy Brandy!

[turning to Fezzik]

Vizzini: And you: friendless, brainless, helpless, hopeless! Do you want me to send you back to where you were? Unemployed in Greenland!

Source: The Princess Bride

Quote of the Day (2014-03-30)

As the horrendous Black Beast lunged forward, escape for Arthur and his knights seemed hopeless. When, suddenly, the animator suffered a fatal heart attack. [ulk] The cartoon peril was no more. The Quest for Holy Grail could continue.

Source: Holy Grail

Quote of the Day (2014-03-29)

Listen, lad. I've built this kingdom up from nothing. When I started here, all there was was swamp. The king said I was daft to build a castle in a swamp, but I built it all the same, just to show 'em. It sank into the swamp. So, I built a second one. That sank into the swamp. So I built a third one. That burned down, fell over, then sank into the swamp. But the fourth one stayed up. An' that's what your gonna get, lad -- the strongest castle in these islands.

Source: Holy Grail

Quote of the Day (2014-03-28)

Rebbecca: Oh, why can't more men send flowers?

Sam: I didn't know Mormons couldn't send flowers.

Rebbecca: I said more men, not Mormons.

Sam: I know they can't dance.

Norm: No Sammy, that's the -- that's the Amish.

Sam: Why can't Mormons send flowers?

Rebbecca: They can.

Sam: What are you talking about?

Rebbecca: I just wish someone would send me some damn roses.

Sam: Why does it have to be a Mormon?

Rebbecca: Oh! [storms off]

Sam: Some people you just can't discuss religion with.

Source: Cheers

Quote of the Day (2014-03-27)

"I don't like the opera. What are they singing for? Who sings? You got something to say, say it."

Source: Seinfeld

Quote of the Day (2014-03-26)

Mary: Hey, you want to go upstairs and watch SportsCenter?

Ted: No, I think I'm just going to quit while I'm ahead.

Mary: You're not that far ahead, Ted.

Source: There's Something About Mary

Quote of the Day (2014-03-25)

Uncle Willie: [hung over] Awww... this is one of those days that the pages of history teach us are best spent lying in bed.

Source: The Philadelphia Story

Quote of the Day (2014-03-24)

Derek Zoolander: So join now, 'cause at the Derek Zoolander Center For Kids Who Can't Read Good And Wanna Learn To Do Other Stuff Good Too, we teach you that there's more to life than just being really, really, really good looking. Right kids?

Source: Zoolander

Quote of the Day (2014-03-23)

HEAD KNIGHT: Shh shh. We are now the Knights Who Say Ecky-ecky-ecky-ecky-pikang-zoom-boing-mumble-mumble.

RANDOM: Nee!

Source: Holy Grail

Quote of the Day (2014-03-22)

We're knights of the round table

We dance whene'er we're able

We do routines and chorus scenes

With footwork impeccable.

We dine well here in Camelot

We eat ham and jam and spam a lot.



We're knights of the Round Table

Our shows are formidable

But many times

We're given rhymes

That are quite unsingable

We're opera mad in Camelot

We sing from the diaphragm a lot.



In war we're tough and able.

Quite indefatigable

Between our quests

We sequin vests

And impersonate Clark Gable

It's a busy life in Camelot.



I have to push the pram a lot.

Source: Holy Grail

Quote of the Day (2014-03-21)

Frasier: I remember the very first time I ever held him [Frederick] in my arms as a newborn. It was as if everything else in the universe simply melted away. There was just a father, a son, and the distant sound of Lilith saying, "If you ever come near me again, Frasier, I'll drop you with a deer rifle."

Source: Frasier

Quote of the Day (2014-03-20)

Rebecca: Until I began eating clean, I never realized how a good a nice, dry ricecake could taste.

Woody: How can you eat those, Miss Howe, they don't have any flavor.

Rebecca: Oh, if I eat these I will live longer.

Woody: Well, I have a question. You know how you're always talking about how you hate your life? How come you wanna make it longer?

Rebecca: Shut up, Woody.

Source: Cheers

Quote of the Day (2014-03-19)

Alvy Singer: I feel that life is divided into the horrible and the miserable. That's the two categories. The horrible are like, I don't know, terminal cases, you know, and blind people, crippled. I don't know how they get through life. It's amazing to me. And the miserable is everyone else. So you should be thankful that you're miserable, because that's very lucky, to be miserable.

Source: Annie Hall

Quote of the Day (2014-03-18)

C. K. Dexter Haven: [looking for the "hair of the dog"] Do you s'pose, sir, speaking of eye-openers...?

Uncle Willie: Oh, that's the first sane remark I've heard today. C'malong, Dexter, I know a formula that's said to pop the pennies off the eyelids of dead Irishmen.

Source: The Philadelphia Story

Quote of the Day (2014-03-17)

Marge: [to Bart] Now we have to find another school for you.

Homer: And if you get kicked out of that one, you're going straight in the army, where you'll be sent straight to America's latest military quagmire. Where will it be? North Korea? Iran? Anything's possible with Commander Cuckoo-Bananas in charge.

Source: The Simpsons

Quote of the Day (2014-03-16)

It's only a flesh wound.

Source: Holy Grail

Quote of the Day (2014-03-15)

Alvy Singer: Sylvia Plath - interesting poetess whose tragic suicide was misinterpreted as romantic by the college girl mentality.

Source: Annie Hall

Quote of the Day (2014-03-14)

Inigo Montoya: You are sure nobody's follow' us?

Vizzini: As I told you, it would be absolutely, totally, and in all other ways inconceivable. No one in Guilder knows what we've done, and no one in Florin could have gotten here so fast. - Out of curiosity, why do you ask?

Inigo Montoya: No reason. It's only... I just happened to look behind us and something is there.

Vizzini: What? Probably some local fisherman, out for a pleasure cruise, at night... in... eel-infested waters?

Source: The Princess Bride

Quote of the Day (2014-03-13)

Marty DiBergi: Do you feel that playing rock 'n' roll music keeps you a child? That is, keeps you in a state of arrested development?

Derek Smalls: No. No. No. I feel it's like, it's more like going, going to a, a national park or something. And there's, you know, they preserve the moose. And that's, that's my childhood up there on stage. That moose, you know.

Marty DiBergi: So when you're playing you feel like a preserved moose on stage?

Derek Smalls: Yeah.

Source: This is Spinal Tap

Quote of the Day (2014-03-12)

Rose Schwartz: Actors don't like to play coma. They feel it limits their range.

Source: Soapdish

Quote of the Day (2014-03-11)

Sir Humphrey: "Arnold, are you suggesting that I should have the Prime Minister crawling all over Salisbury Plain, with a mine detector in one hand and a packet of Winalot in the other?"

Sir Arnold: "It would probably do Britain less harm than anything else he is likely to be doing."

Source: Yes, Prime Minister

Quote of the Day (2014-03-10)

Niles: Her lips said no, but her eyes said read my lips.

Source: Frasier

Quote of the Day (2014-03-09)

[In California]

Annie Hall: It's so clean out here.

Alvy Singer: That's because they don't throw their garbage away, they turn it into television shows.

Source: Annie Hall

Quote of the Day (2014-03-08)

Alvy Singer: They did not take me in the Army. I was, um, interestingly enough, I was, I was 4-P. Yes. In the, in the event of war, I'm a hostage.

Source: Annie Hall

Quote of the Day (2014-03-07)

[Vizzini has just cut the rope The Dread Pirate Roberts is climbing up]

Vizzini: HE DIDN'T FALL? INCONCEIVABLE.

Inigo Montoya: You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

Source: The Princess Bride

Quote of the Day (2014-03-06)

The past tempts us, the present confuses us, and the future frightens us...and our lives slip away, moment by moment, lost in that vast, terrible in-between.

Source: Babylon 5

Quote of the Day (2014-03-05)

She turned me into a newt! I got better.

Source: Holy Grail

Quote of the Day (2014-03-04)

[Frasier's rocker neighbor's music is shaking his apartment]

Frasier: Doesn't he take a break for sex and drugs?

Source: Frasier

Quote of the Day (2014-03-03)

Homer: It's true, I'm a rageoholic! I just can't get enough RAGEOHOL!

[cries]

Source: The Simpsons

Quote of the Day (2014-03-02)

It's a fine line between clever and stupid.

Source: This is Spinal Tap

Quote of the Day (2014-03-01)

[Niles' new ad, which should describe him as a Jung specialist]

Niles: Remember the ad I placed. They have made a tiny little typo. See if you can find it.

Frasier: Niles Crane . . . Hung Specialist

Niles: The rest they got perfectly. Servicing individuals, couples, groups. Satisfaction guaranteed. Tell me when it hurts.

Source: Frasier